Remembering Hope Angel

Dearest Sally,

I am in Central America today. Hope's birthday. But I know on her day, I will be thinking about her, remembering her, and holding you and Simon close to my heart. But because I am not near a computer, I lit a candle on one of the days before I left and I cried thinking about how unfair it all is, thinking about how beautiful she is, thinking about how I wish this weren't the way motherhood was for you the last year. Her candle stands next to my Lucy's candle on our mizuko jizo altar.

I wish, I fucking wish, we didn't meet in this damn dead baby corner of the universe, but I am also so thankful we met. My friend. My pen pal. You give so very much to this community. I don't know if you realize how much compassion and love you spread here. I don't know if you realize the impact of Hope's life in the lives of all these women grieving the loss of their own babies...it is palpable, Sal. We all love Hope. We all miss her. And we all hold you close, as part of this large mourning family of women.

And so, today, on Hope's first birthday, know I am remembering Hope, missing her, crying with you, looking towards the future, with the pure beautiful optimistic light of Hope.

Abrazos y besos,
Angie