Friday, August 21, 2009

Remembering Lev River

Dearest Aliza,

If I were home, I would send this as an email, but I'm not. So, I will do it this way. I wish I could see you this week, though we've never met. Maybe we would meditate together, or walk in a jizo garden. Maybe we would smash plates or drink some beautiful local wine, but I know we would sit together and cry. It is so unfair that Lev is not here with you. I cannot pretend that his first birthday will bring any sort of peace. In fact, I know it won't. It means you have spent a year missing part of your heart. It means a year of mourning.

But I do know, Aliza, that this year you have given me an understanding of truth, mothering and love. I hold you, Arik and your Lev, your beautiful Lev, in my heart everyday, but in particular, this day, I remember. I cannot see a heart without thinking of him, without remembering his short life, without seeing a small glimmer of beauty. I miss your son, Aliza. I miss Lev in this world.

With love,


  1. Beautifully put. You have a heart of gold, Angie.
    Remembering Lev with love today and always.

  2. thank you dear sweet angie. i love that you think of lev whenever you see a heart. we had the heart you sent us out by lev's first birthday candle.

    wish we could hug, smash plates and drink wine together. hope to meet you in real life one day.



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